It Was Bound to Happen
Posted by Aragoen Celtdra on November 20th, 2009
I have postponed my BCMSN exam at least five times now. Everytime the test date neared I rescheduled because I wasn’t ready. As I mentioned before I was due and ready to pass the exam just 2 weeks before my mom died. Then she got sicker and eventually passed away. Ever since then I haven’t been in the right mindset and kept postponing/rescheduling my test. Then last week, I forgot to reschedule and lost my $150 fee for not taking it.
It has come across my mind to just cancel the test and get a refund. Then reschedule again for when I was actually ready. But stupid me kept thinking that if I did that then I surely will never take that test. The only assurance or driving force I had, if you will, is keeping the test date hoping that it will drive me towards studying more – and that I can always reschedule if I wasn’t ready.
I have been studying but just not as diligently and focused as I used to. Every day I take about 45 minutes are so to sit down and do some studying. It just doesn’t cut it compared to the hours per day that I used to do. Knowledge acquisition becomes very slow and retention seems to get weaker as longer days pass without touching the same subject again.
I need a new catalyst. And no, I don’t mean a new switch. 
November 21st, 2009 at 3:10 am
Hey Aragoen,
Take it slow and easy man. The CCNP like the CCIE isn’t a race game so it does not matter how fast you get it. I am sorry again for your loss. I really hope that you’ll nail the BCMSN soon.
November 21st, 2009 at 9:14 pm
We’re rooting for ya’!
November 23rd, 2009 at 9:47 am
@Nickleby @Seraphus: Thanks guys. Good news is, after I wrote this post, I suddenly had the urge to study more. So I studied two hours the same day I published it. Hahaha. Maybe I should post more to motivate myself.
November 24th, 2009 at 7:44 am
I’ve had that same problem my entire life. I’ve been on chapter 2 of my ISCW book for weeks now with no progress in sight.
Keep on it, though. We all want you to finish!
December 14th, 2009 at 8:53 am
Yo G! snap out of it!what I mean is this..give yourself 6 months to grieve the loss of your mother…then hit it again. I would cancel the exams and get a refund.
the reason I say schedule a time to grieve is to go out and play around,
it will come back abscense makes the heart grow fonder..After my divorce with my exwife, I grieved 4 years and wasted my life on grieving. I did some soul searching and decided grieving is good but only for a time. .just relax
you live in california and I use to live there it is a rat race…you have to try to let it go and just live life and enjoy your new family then after 6 months stop grieving
and hit it hard but within reason pace yourself. I know once my college work is done I am going to take a big break maybe 3 months to 6 months just cause i need it then hammer it up again. you can do it. we like your posts and we enjoy your great blog but we dont need you. You need your family and your life back.
grieve for 6 months enjoy your kids, be here now and then know in 6 months you are going to stop grieving and hit it! your mom I bet would want you to move on. Your mom wouldnt want you to grieve your whole life.
6 months, enjoy your family and kids, wife and play around
then hit the switch man!
you can do it.
I lost my mother at 12 years old to cancer. it was very hard to go on with life
but I am living life to the fullest and my mom like your mom would want you too!
-Robert
December 18th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
I’m from Chile and CISCO CCNA study
for my CCNA is a bit complicated, but looking at your blog I am very encouraged to continue studying
this blog is very useful to me, congratulations for everything you’ve accomplished
losing a loved one is sad, but you have to think that she is watching you from heaven and she wants the world’s best for you and your family.
Good luck on your journey of knowledge and learning.
greetings from Chile
Victor Gonzalez
Note: Sorry about my English is a bit bad = S
December 19th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I am from Holland (the Netherlands) and studying for BSCI. Your Blog is awsome and gives me great material to study with.
Give it time but also go on with your life after a while.
Hope to see you back soon
Marianne
December 29th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
Get up on feet soldier. The battle ain’t done yet. We won’t be free until we get there.
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
- Winston Churchill
January 2nd, 2010 at 1:55 pm
Aragoen – I too am studying BCMSN – but finding the time is hard, especially with a family – so dont worry about time. Take it step by step and remember that its not a race. Paperwork isnt everything in this industry, experience counts a lot more. Being able to find solutions to real-life problems gives me a bigger kick than passing any exam and that cannot be tested on an exam – as all problems are unique. Good luck with the studying!