Well, I’m back from this weekend’s retreat. Although it’s hard to say that it was a retreat because I came back very tired and exhausted that it hardly felt like a “retreat” from anything at all. I didn’t even get to study last night. After I bathed my son around 8:30 PM, I fell right to sleep. I was supposed to be reading him his bed time books but instead, he read me to sleep. I don’t even remember how I managed to get back to my own bed.

On Thursday night I completed my challenge and clocked in 1:43:04 of study time. I know it’s not exactly 2 hours that I set out to do. But I gave myself some leeway because I never clocked the time I setup lab and some missed time on the clock as well. Also I was under pressure to get the studying done because I had to learn a few songs that night before leaving on Friday night for the weekend retreat.

I just want to jot down a few thoughts about the weekend. It definitely was something that I probably needed in this moment of my life right now. Although I was busy switching roles from being the music guy to a dish-washer , I had the opportunity to listen in to some very good talks. Since it is a spiritual retreat, a lot of it was centered on religious topics. I think what I enjoyed the most, though,  were the talks that centered on the family and the issues that affect family life. As a father and a husband, I constantly need a reminder what I’m doing all this for. All this studying and pursuit to becoming a better engineer is inspired by my desire to be a better provider for my family. And I guess sometimes I lose track of that especially when I am too deep into my studies. There are even occasions where I ignored my son while studying when I was supposed to be watching him.

During the retreat, I was particularly inspired by a gentleman, about my age, who was invited to speak to our guests about importance of family in the context of Christian living. The cool thing about it is that I knew this guy from a while back from playing in a basketball league together. I only knew him from seeing him on the courts, but I never had a deeper insight into his life until he had spoken to us. After he spoke I took some time to congratulate him and talk to him a little bit more about his ideas on family living. I was pleased to learn that his goals for his family is in line with my goals for our family. His wife is a stay at home mother, raising their two beautiful kids to be stewards of greatness. And no matter how poor they get, he says, he makes sure that they remain that way. And I believe him. Because no mater how successful he has become as a banker, I see them driving a very modest vehicle, and living in a modest home.

How is this all related to Cisco. Well, probably not much. At least not directly. But thinking about it more allowed me to correlate a lot of my pursuit in my studies to my life’s calling. I believe that to be a good father, a good husband and a good provider, I need to be good at what I do in my profession. I can’t have an orderly family life if everything else in my life is in disarray. If I have a lackluster career because of lackluster skills, then my ability to provide for my family will also be lacking. If I cannot perform at a high level of proficiency and expertise at work, how can I expect myself to do the same at home.  And this is where my calling as a husband/father ties in with my pursuit to become an excellent engineer. Sure many are able to and do separate their day jobs from their family life. But for me, fulfillment is partly defined by how I am able to manage my profession to better serve my family as well as others. This hasn’t happened yet, but one day, I’ll get closer to getting it right.

Tonight, I tackle BGP…